Since childhood, religion and spirituality have been extraordinarily important factors in my life. I have always been intrigued by spiritual questions and could never just accept on faith what “the church” told me. I have taken issue with many of Christianity’s dogmatic positions and approaches, and my desire to explore and question has led to a series of difficult encounters with the church. After considerable turmoil I left the Catholic Church, but the guilt they sowed stuck to me for many years. I turned to Protestantism but eventually it led to similar conflicts. Over the years, the church has destroyed my trust and hence my ability to have faith in their teachings. I have concluded that I will never be able to reconcile my views with theirs. Therefore I can never be true to myself and be a church member in good standing.

Rather than continuing this fruitless struggle to fit in, I have defined my own personal spiritual beliefs. I will not try to justify my position nor will I attempt to convert others to my beliefs. What I will do is to live up to them to the best of my ability.

When I consider the origin of the universe, a big bang followed solely by random evolution doesn’t come close to explaining things for me. What existed before the big bang? Did something come from nothing? Did something always exist? If time always existed, how did we ever get to this point in time? How can very simple organisms evolve into wildly complex organisms of a different species? Questions like these make my brain swirl and lead me to believe that there is something so far beyond us that it is incomprehensible. I call that something the Supreme Being.

What I can’t accept is the idea of a personal God who is guiding events. When I look at history, it is not possible for me to make any sense of the idea of a God who is rewarding the good and punishing the bad. The church encourages us to accept our lot in life and look to “the next world” for our reward. I cannot find any credible evidence that the next world exists. What keeps coming to mind is the quote from Karl Marx that casts religion as the opiate of the people. Certainly, religion has been used throughout history to keep the discontented masses in line while the church and others in power systematically abused them. If this is our personal God’s master plan, I don’t know why I’d choose to be part of it.

I don’t know for sure who Jesus was or what he really said and did, but I do believe that he provided a roadmap to follow. He didn’t extract selected Bible verses and use their literal translation to brand some people as special sinners. He did use Scripture as a whole to show how we all fall short and told us to clean up our own acts rather than judging others. He used parables and stories to teach important lessons. He said that we are to be known by our love and compassion for others. He reached out to everyone and included society’s outcasts in his circle of followers. The only group that he chastised was the religious leaders whom he denounced for placing heavy burdens on the shoulders of the people and for acting superior to others. He called them hypocrites who talked about the letter of the law but failed to observe its spirit.

At the core of every major religious movement is one basic message. It is often identified as “The Golden Rule” and simply means to treat others, all others, the way you wish to be treated. Following the Golden Rule is how I wish to live my life.