We had selected a topic for our next "Sweetheart Connection" article but time pressures had prevented us from preparing it prior to the S.P.I.C.E. conference. Richard dutifully lugged his laptop computer along with the best of intentions of at least starting the article during our vacation that preceded the conference. We were getting so relaxed and having so much fun in lovely, hospitable Hotlanta that neither of us was willing to set aside the time to work on the article. We felt guilty, but our failure to tend to our duties eventually turned out to be serendipity at its very best.
From the opening presentation through the final dinner we knew that the conference itself had to be the focus of our column. Having experienced those wonderful days at SPICE in Atlanta there was no possibility that we would write about anything else.
Throughout the event both Richard and I felt that it was an excellent conference but it was the closure session on Saturday afternoon that really demonstrated the magnitude of its impact on the lives of the attendees. When asked what they had learned about the theme of the conference, to move "From Stumbling Blocks Towards Stepping Stones," person after person shared the changes that had occurred for them. People who seldom spoke in a gathering and never spoke to an audience, stood in front of the group and shared their deepest emotions. Talk about moving from low self-esteem to self-confidence. WOW!
Tissues were passed freely as one person after another talked about the learning, sharing, support and friendship that permeated the air. Many of us found our eyes damp multiple times in response to the obvious depth to which people had been touched. Tremendous breakthroughs in understanding were evident everywhere. Wives were understanding the pain that their husbands had endured. Husbands were understanding how the revelation of cross-dressing had damaged the trust in their relationships. There was significantly less "Me" and significantly more "Us" in evidence.
People were communicating feelings from the depths of their souls and their words and body language were true and alive and in perfect congruence. Wives and husbands were learning how to tell their partner what they felt, what they needed and what they wanted. People not only spoke from their hearts but also listened with their hearts. It was a magnificent time and clearly demonstrated that many participants had learned how to move through communication barriers to strong communication skills.
Power struggles were being pushed aside by agreements and depression was fading from the scene to be replaced by a large dose of inner peace. After dinner Saturday night, hugs and good fellowship abounded. Names and addresses were exchanged as many now had developed the confidence to share personal information and continue talking to someone they had grown to trust. Clearly the good work wasn't going to stop at the conference doors but was going to follow many of them home. There was such an amazing atmosphere of just plain warmth and caring that the hotel staff was convinced that we were a religious group -- "they're such nice people."
If you are reading this article, well of course you are or you wouldn't be reading this, and you weren't at SPICE this year; please give serious consideration to putting the next SPICE on your calendar NOW!
You deserve all of the happiness that is possible from a mutually committed relationship so bring your partner and experience it for yourself. You will benefit in knowledge, awareness, self-respect and love from attending. It sounds like a tall order but as George from The Men's Warehouse says, "I guarantee it." Once you go, you'll want to tell all of your friends to go too.
We're telling ours now - GO TO SPICE!
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